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Post by Marina Anne Sinclaire on Aug 23, 2013 1:43:16 GMT -6
----------------------- [/b]  -----------------------[/b] “I’m not pretty I’m a mess. I’m a freak. Most vampires feel strong and powerful and all I wanted was to be what I had been. I never wanted to be this and what was worse was that along the way I’ve hurt good people and I can remember them.” She was babbling but it had been so long since anyone had just talked to her as a real person it was like she couldn’t stop. “I’m not perfect. I’m a train wreck. You deserve someone who is not a basket case.”
She shook her head, “I’m not an angel. An angel would smite me for being evil and a minion of hell even if I’m different than some vampires out there. I’ve killed people Chris. I’m no saint. I’ve lost control during the Inquisition and World War II. I killed people, it didn’t matter if they deserved it or not. I did it and played God and that makes me just as bad as anyone who ever murdered someone. So please don’t call me a saint because I’m not. Maybe I deserve to be alone. Maybe that is why my friends have no time for me. Because they know I’m not a good person.” What she was saying made no sense but she just was having a hard time wrapping her mind around everything that had happened and was happening.
She may have been a good person but she did not see it that way. That was what made it hard for her. She wanted to have friends but part of her always felt she was that insane girl that had been locked away for five years and therefore she wasn’t worthy of friends. She could be happy and bubbly but honestly, no one stuck around and it got harder to do it every year. She was scared she was going to mess Chris up. Badly. She shook in his arms as he held her and wiped her face, her small body shivering from emotion.
“I’m not good enough for anyone. I mean my own family is gone and my friends are busy most of the time. If I was a good person people would be around me and talk to me. I’m not good enough to be with anyone. If I’d even been a good nun I’d have died before I was turned but I couldn’t even do that right.” She began hiccupping. She’d never told anyone what had happened or how she had felt. No one knew just how hard it was to interact. She did it. Every day, but it was so hard and she shivered inside every time.
She was slowly learning, but it was still emotionally draining on her and Chris’ exuberance was alien to her. She’d never been that happy except when she danced or sang and even then, most people took it for granted. To her, music, dancing was a way to forget that she was a Scottish peasant that had been dragged kicking and screaming into the undead world.
Tag: Chris
Words: 508
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Post by matthew on Aug 27, 2013 3:19:44 GMT -6
---------------- ---------------- Chris listened to her as she poured her heart out. He could not believe how she saw herself. To him she was beautiful on the inside and out. And he wished she would see it that way. He placed his finger gently on her lips to get her to stop. "I deserve you. Marina Sinclaire." He moved his finger from her lip and continued. "And the last time I checked. Am here talking with you. If your friends are busy let them be. Am here. Am not perfect either. I shot myself remember. My mom used to say if you're always looking in the rear view mirror you cannot see the road ahead. We can make one another stronger. I started living again the day you saved my life. And I want you to do the same. Just please do not be stupid like me and shot yourself." He smiled at her.
He took her by both hands, holding them gentle in his. "Your good enough for me. And among you and I am glad your were not a very good nun." Chris laughed hopping she would at lest smile. Marina started to hiccup. He never knew vampires could hiccup. "Claim down please. I know it sucked. Undead life sucks. And I hate it. But I do not hate you. And If I had not been turned then I never would have met you."
How could he show her that he was telling her the truth and that he cared for her. "Marina I." He wanted to kiss her. But did not know how she would handle it. He moved closer to her. "I just. Well I can't say it. Am sorry. Words have failed me." He grabbed her and held his hand at the small of her back as he dipped her. He pressed his lips on herS. He kissed her with all the pent up passion he had been holding back ever since he first met her. Chris broke the kiss and stepped back speechless. ---------------- Words:337 Outfit: |
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Post by Marina Anne Sinclaire on Aug 27, 2013 23:56:14 GMT -6
----------------------- [/b] -----------------------[/b] Looking up at Chris she sighed softly trying to listen to his words and not just ignore them because he was young. She was not so foolish as to think that he had nothing of value to say. Eventually her tears stopped and she tried to calm herself a bit more. “I’m not likely to hurt myself any more. Modern psychiatry has gotten that far.” She said simply as she looked at him in the eyes and did her best to calm herself. He seemed to really want to cheer her up and for the life of her she couldn’t fathom why he had this depth of feeling.
She only did what any good vampire would do. She wasn’t doing something special. She could be replaced, indeed if she was staked tomorrow it would probably be weeks before Stefan even noticed with how busy he was with his new friends. She shook her head, “Everyone leaves me, Chris. Everyone. Its got to be me. I have to do something to cause this. I’m broken somehow and I don’t know how to fix it.” She closed her eyes and sagged. How was she supposed to help him when she could barely help herself? It was like suddenly realizing this other person needed you more than anything else in the world. The shock of it was part of what was upsetting her. She could barely qualify as taking care of herself, much less anyone else. It was a difficulty that she did not know how to deal with.
He moved towards her quickly and she could barely make out what he was saying before he kissed her. She felt his arms wrap around her and she gripped him to keep from falling. She felt her body grow warm from being held so her body fitting against his half in fear of being dropped and half instinctively. She didn’t know what to do. She felt the kiss down to the tips of her toes and as Anne Hathaway said in Princess Diaries the urge to do a foot pop was there. Not that she did it but there was a part of her that felt she was floating on a fluffy white cloud of bliss. She shivered as he held her.
When he broke the kiss she felt her balance wobble. She could barely stand as he looked at her. She didn’t know what to say, after all he had kissed her. She didn’t know how these things went.
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Post by ADMIN ASHLEY on Sept 11, 2013 23:06:02 GMT -6
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