::Angel:: Been Waiting For Someone Like You

[angel]

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"No, Buffy.. what you want does matter, stop thinking about others for a moment.." He stated shaking his head lightly with a small frown, if only he could take her away.. on holiday somewhere? just so that she could think about her self.. have that time she need to her self.. all he had seen since his return was Buffy worrying about others, doing this and that, because of others..he wished if for a moment that she would place herself first.. "Yes you will, that is expected but you need to have time for yourself too Buffy.." he urged, hoping she would understand, and see it the way he saw it.. and although that seemed rather unlikely he knew it would do her a world of good. When she commented about dreaming.. among other things Angel wrapped his arms tighter around her slender frame, once all the soap and shampoo had been rinsed from her.

Dropping a kiss to her shoulder he murmured softly. "Maybe they will maybe they won't.. but it doesn't hurt to have dreams..you don't know how they turn out unless you try." he added calmly, his voice soft all the while that he spoke to her. Yet, even as she spoke about dreams.. his unbeating heart cracked that further more, if only there was something.. anything he could do to make things better, the way in which Buffy thought.. to give up on dreams.. seemed wrong, and not at all healthy. However, before he could say anything more on the subject, and having told Buffy what it was that was bothering him, Buffy spoke.. and so he listened, watching her expression all the while, it was only when she turned around so that she sat facing him, her slender frame positioned in such a away that caused his entire body to tense.. try as he might to push such wicked thoughts aside.. it proved difficult. None the less he remained attentive despite Buffy's body before him.

Shaking his head, Angel released her frame, his hands came up to rest upon her face, cupping her cheek as he in turn pushed her damp hair back from her face. Her words brought a soft tug within him.. one that urged him to hold on tighter, to never let go and to bask in this one moment that they shared without the worry of others. Despite her words being as true as they were, and intimate as they were, Angle's brown eyes softened.. "No Buffy, I can't give you everything that you want. Yes, I can give you my heart and my soul.. but I can't give you my body. Yet I want to, more than anything I wish I could, what hurts the most is that I am still left wanting more.. you give me everything, yet still I want more.. does it make me selfish? at times I even wonder how is it I deserve you? how I deserve to see you like this?" he commented as his hands fell from her face, to glance over her body. His hands trailed down her neck, pausing over the bite he had given her. Frowning, he sighed softly until his hands came to rest idly over her hips.

I could ask you the same thing. Love isn't supposed to be easy...if it was why would love mean as much as it does? Buffy said, and she was right. Love was never easy, nor was it ever meant to be; but he couldn't help but wonder why, why she stayed with him when he could not give her the one thing they both craved. As Buffy continued, he chuckled lowly at her way with words; tilting his head to the side he smiled softly, he couldn't argue with that. He too had once tried to deny it, but it was no use. Lifting a hand he cupped her chin and slowly brought it forward so that his lips met hers in a slow kiss, and very slightly his other arm that was hooked around her waist pulled her to him in which he slowly laid back that fraction more. Allowing the warm water to coat his and her body, each movement and gesture to the slightest shift was carefully measured and controlled. To the extent that he was almost too afraid to move.. right now as they were seemed good enough, safe enough and manageable.


Notes: ohh getting a bit steamy here! ;]

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[Buffy Anne Summers]

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She sighed as she tried to think of how to make Angel understand. She had been selfish as a teenager and it had caught up to her in the end. She had been selfish to want Angel and look what happened, she had ended up releasing Angelus which in turn allowed Giles' girlfriend to get killed. Of course she wouldn't use that example to him because it would make him feel guilty even though he had tried to talk her out of wanting him more than once. She had been selfish to try and save the world and Dawn, giving her own life instead of dealing with the ramifications of losing her sister…and yet what happened? Her friends had pulled her out of heaven.

So maybe some people wouldn’t think that dying in the place of someone you loved was selfish but in her mind it was. She was done and finished, and had been ready to let go. She hadn’t wanted to live anymore, especially not at the expense of anyone else so instead of dealing she had let go…and she had paid the ultimate price for it. She remembered when she was sixteen she had thought the ultimate price would be death but no…the ultimate price in her eyes was life…and now was even worse because she would never know the true freedom again since she was cursed to a life of being alone forever…well…not alone but whatever, the case was that she would always be fighting the darkness instead of embracing the light once again.

She shivered at the kiss against her shoulder and leaned back, her head against his chest and once again the scar that marred her neck stood out prominently against her skin. “I do have dreams…dreams for the girls that I’m teaching. I dream that one day they will be able to see slaying as something that draws them together, a special club of sorts that makes it to where other people know what you’re going through. I looked at it for long as a curse and I don’t want the girls to feel that way. It was a large price to pay to be the only one in the world with the strength and skill…and while even though I was only alone for a little over a year before Kendra and then Faith showed up but still, I never really worked with them for an extended period of time without something going wrong. So it would have been a lot less stress on me and that’s what I hope for the girls.” She stated, knowing that it wasn’t the type of dream that Angel wanted her to dream but really, what else was she supposed to dream about? Sure she dreamed about being with Angel forever but she doubted he’d want to hear that right now so she refrained from spilling those particular details.

She felt his arousal near her own but she ignored it though she did feel him tense when she turned around to face him. She didn't think about how easy it would be to move her legs to accommodate him sliding within her, though she was sure she would later when she was in bed alone. Feeling his hands cupping her cheeks she looked into his deep brown eyes. "Just because we can't make love doesn't mean that we can't be intimate Angel." She told him softly. "Besides, I don't know about you but I'd rather be wrapped up in your arms and not be able to feel you inside me rather than be with someone else who I could. Maybe that's just me but that's the honest truth." He had never understood, well, never believed her when she said she’d rather be with him than anyone else…she just hoped this time it got through his head.

Before she could go any further in explaining herself his soft lips met hers and she sighed in contentment as she rested all her weight on top of him. She knew one wrong move could end the serenity that they were currently experiencing in one another’s arms however she promised herself she wouldn’t make that move. When she finally had to pull away to breath she smiled down at him. “This is all I need Angel.” She whispered to him before leaning down, her bare breasts against his chest and placed a gentle kiss against his lips. “Just us.”

Word Count:: 762
Tag:: Liam ‘Angel’ O’Connor
Outfit:: Click here for Buffy’s Outfit
Note:: Hehehehee, of course they are! They are Buffy and Angel!

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[angel]

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For a long moment Angel lay back within the bath, Buffy upon him and against him and although it certainly was a struggle not to move, for the slightest movement would not end to well.. well it would in a sense.. but unfortunately he could not allow that luxury.. not now.. and probably not ever and that was what bothered him the most.. denying Buffy his body.. for should he do that then his soul would be lost. it was a vicious circle, one he was in no hurry to repeat; despite what he felt for her and what he longed for. The kiss they shared was soft and sweet, filled with temptation and infection and it too every ounce of his control not to reach out for that one moment of pure happiness. Instead, breaking the kiss before things got to.. heated, he rested his head back against the bath, looking up to Buffy as she remained settled and ever so still a top him.

Returning to the conversation previously, he tilted his head a fraction, his hand reaching up to idly trail up and down her cheek in soft loving movements. Despite Buffy's idea of a dream.. it wasn't healthy but it was a dream none the less and who was he to argue with that? It was just a pity, that Buffy could not have more.. for she deserved it. Yet as she had continued talking, Angel gestured her to lay closer, softly guiding her head so that it came to rest upon his chest, his hand cupping and stroking her wet hair, as he dropped a kiss to her forehead. "I can't begin to imagine what it was like for you when you were younger...and nor could I compare anything to it, but your not alone now Buffy.. and those other girls are lucky to have such a dedicated teacher looking out for them" he stated, dropping a kiss to her head again. For a moment they lay there, until the ache he felt below his waist was become almost too much to bare. Slowly he lightly pushed Buffy from him, until he sat up and she once again sat before him.

Deciding to leave the topic alone for now he spoke. "So.. as it's you and me, what did you feel like doing for the rest of the evening?" He questioned.. yes there was something he'd like to be doing, more than anything. To spend the night with Buffy, as she slept and maybe even make love every now and then.. such thoughts took him back to that day he had been human, such a wonderful day it had been as well.. and it was hard remembering such bliss without feeling that urge resurfacing. As awkward as it felt with his arousal as prominent as it was he lent forward and pressed a kiss to her lips once, briefly. "Have you eaten? Maybe I can get you something and we watch a few films?" He suggested, that was better than nothing at the very, least plus it meant that he got to spend more time with her. With that said slowly.. and awkwardly he climbed out of the bath, reaching to grab the nearest towel and wrap it around his lower half.. even though it did little to hide anything..

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[Buffy Anne Summers]

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She could feel that he wanted her and that did more for her self esteem than anything could. She knew it was probably cruel to be happy that he was aroused with nothing to do about it however she was still a woman in love with a man, no matter that she knew the consequences should they be together in that way again. The fact still remained that even after all these years he still wanted her. She knew that it was ridiculous to question it since clearly even Angelus wanted her which was proven when the two of them slept together.

Even after knowing all this she had doubts. She still had memories of the day after she lost her virginity to Angel and the cruel words that Angelus had spoken. You've got a lot to learn about men kiddo. Although I guess you proved that last night. Those words had haunted her for months...years if she wanted to be completely honest. She and Angel had never spoken about it and at first she had thought that he agreed with his soulless self. Of course now she knew that he just didn't want to speak about that time when his evil alter ego had been in charge but it still bothered her.

So to feel that he wanted her was a relief...though one she felt guilty about since she knew that they could do nothing about it. Hearing his words about the girls and her dreams for them she pulled herself away from her thoughts and back into the present. "I wasn't always alone...I had Will and Xan, I had Giles...and I had you for a little bit. Unfortunately you were the only one who could really truly get it..." She stated, trailing off. "When Riley and I were together he tried but he liked to hunt...he saw it as a career...but he didn't seem to grasp that there's only one way out for me and it's in a body bag."

She felt a little hurt that he pushed her away but she understood, watching as he stood up. She averted her eyes to not cause him any further embarrassment. "I'll order something..." She told him, standing up and moving so that she was behind him and grabbed her own towel to wrap around herself. "I'll change and meet you downstairs." She told him, removing herself and him from temptation.

Word Count:: 430
Tag:: Liam ‘Angel’ O’Connor
Outfit:: Click here for Buffy’s Outfit
Note:: <3

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[angel]

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"True, you did have Willow and Xander, as well as the others, but even despite the fact they were with you, when I saw you.." He paused, recalling the time he had stepped foot into her house to speak with her.. where they had kissed and such a kiss had triggered his hunger, resulting in him showing Buffy his face.. he had just known that she felt alone.. despite the help, that no one understood her..."Well, You just seemed.. alone despite everyone." he admitted, although he was never to good at such.. supportive comments. None the less having reluctantly pulled away from Buffy to climb out of the bath and wrap a towel around himself, Buffy followed suit, despite her best face he could tell to some degree she was hurt by his gesture.. but what else was he to do? push the limits until they broke? He couldn't risk that.. despite how much he wanted to.

When Buffy announced she was going to meet him downstairs and get changed Angel smile lightly nodding as he did so, in which time he had pulled the plug and headed to his room, where he proceeded to change into a vest top and loose trousers, he had no plan of going anywhere tonight and he was more than content with staying at home with Buffy. Provided she stayed in that was.. Once dressed he made his way from the basement towards the living room, flicking on the TV, he headed to the kitchen, and grabbed a bag of popcorn, with drinks to go with it. Once cooked he poured it into the bowl and headed back into the living room, sure he didn't need to eat, for he couldn't taste it, but it didn't stop him at least having a few bits..if to make things easier on Buffy if nothing else. With drinks and bowls placed on the table he sat down upon the large vacant sofa.

Moments late he could hear the soft footsteps of Buffy as she came down the stairs, turning around partly enough to see her he commented. "I got you popcorn and a hot drink.. Hot chocolate okay? and.. I'm not sure what you want to watch so.. any suggestions?" he questioned, glad that he had since then 'calmed' down after their bath incident. Maybe.. there was something he could do at least? take her out somewhere? or.. well he didn't know, but he wanted to make her feel happy, or as happy as he could. For him, if Buffy was happy than that would be fine for him. She was all that mattered.

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[Buffy Anne Summers]

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She understood what he meant and he was right. She had felt alone...though not nearly as alone as she had after she had graduated high school. Sure she had people around her all the time between Dawn and Willow and Tara living with her and then Giles and Xander essentially living there even though Xander had his own place. Hell even with all the girls living at her house during the First debacle she had still felt alone. The only time she truly had someone to lean on was when Angel was around. When he left she had never felt as lost as she had then…even when she had sent him to hell.

It was one of the reasons she felt herself distancing herself from him lately. It wasn’t that she loved him any less…on the contrary…she loved him even more with each passing day. It was that there was still that fear of him leaving her one day and being back to where she started. She knew she wouldn’t be able to handle being dependent on someone and then them getting up and walking away again. So she had let herself continue to depend on no one but herself…though she didn’t know if Angel truly noticed or not.

Once they were both out she waited until he left the bathroom before she closed the door so that she could get dressed. She knew it didn’t matter to him what she wore so she figured why not be comfortable. Besides it’s not as if he didn’t see all her flaws five seconds ago as they sat in a hot bath completely naked. Really what did it matter at this point? She quickly rummaged through her walk in closet and pulled out a silver cami. She slid on a sports bra under it, rolling her eyes at how unnecessary it was but figuring she'd make things easier and not show off her very small amount of cleavage. She found a pair of yoga pants with a pink foldover top and slid those on as well, pairing them with a zip up black hoodie that she had a feeling used to belong to either Xander, Oz or Riley since she knew it was a guys at one time. She didn't really care and figured no one else would either since she and Willow pretty much threw all their clothes together at one time.

Last but not least she slid on a pair of pink socks that only covered her toes and bottom of her feet. She hated socks but her feet were cold and she figured this way she had it the best of both words or so they said. Once dressed she made her way downstairs, smiling at the scene in front of her as Angel put popcorn and something in a mug down on the coffee table. “You didn’t have to go to any trouble Angel, but thanks.” She told him with a soft smile, taking the mug and sipping on it slowly as to not burn her tongue. “I think us trying to find a movie we both like is going to be pretty much impossible so why don’t we just flick through the channels?” She offered, sitting down on the couch and pulling her legs up underneath her. She didn’t want to crowd him and figured this way he could choose where he sat.

Word Count:: 581
Tag:: Liam ‘Angel’ O’Connor
Outfit:: Click here for Buffy’s Outfit
Note:: <3

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[angel]

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As Buffy took her seat and settled upon the couch, Angle picked up the remote. Something was missing.. he didn't know what it was, but things felt different. Dismissing the thought, of everything having to be bad, Angel took his seat beside Buffy, his arm draped along the back of the sofa behind her as he flicked through each available channel. She was right of course, they wouldn't agree on a film, given the fact he preferred the old classics rather than the modern re-takes. "That's if there is anything on." he mused lightly, flicking between the each as he went, until he landed upon one channel named Dracula, some series with various actors he didn't know, wearing costumes which he did know. He at one point had worn the exact same outfit, and seen others wear the same. Arching his eyebrow, he couldn't help but admit he was curious at how they would portray the vampire.

Glancing to Buffy, he shrugged softly then handed her the remote. "You pick something, it's going to be more interesting then this." he mused, truthfully Angel hadn't really been one for television, he never really watched it, or understood it half the time.. but he couldn't argue with the comedy of the modern day.. some references were just too funny to pass up. With the remote handed over he settled more into the chair, but could not shake that odd feeling, one he couldn't place.. he just felt restless and unsure of things, his attention seemingly focused elsewhere. No matter, he tried none the less to push such thoughts and feelings away.. although he would not admit out loud, he would be far more comfortable merely watching Buffy, which was why his brow eyes traveled her way and watched as she sipped her drink and nibbled on popcorn, it was both amusing to watch yet adorable all the same.

It was silly really that when she looked his way he would pretend to look elsewhere, a ridiculous charade, that he knew Buffy had already figured out. "I'm just going to get a drink." he commented feeling thirsty somewhat, getting to his feet he grabbed the blanket and in an almost playful gesture threw it over Buffy, in order to keep her warm. The house wasn't the warmest of places (not that he could feel a great deal). With that done Angle headed back down into the basement where he made his way over towards the fridge, pulling out a bag, he poured it into a glass, before disposing of the bag into a bin. Taking a sip, he relished in the small amount of quenching it offered him, he half debated taking it up stairs. He didn't like drinking in front of others, yet Cordelia had once announced that they had been family. With that he headed back upstairs glass in tow, before he placed it upon the side table by the couch (hidden somewhat out of view) before he rejoined Buffy, pulling back the blanket to site beside her once again.

"What have you decided on?" he questioned, he truly was not bothered what they watched.. for he was more content with simply spending that time together. Provided.. they actually watched TV in the first place...




note: hint hint

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[Buffy Anne Summers]

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She could feel the tension in the room though she didn't know how to get it to dissipate. She knew that Angel could feel it too though she tried to keep it to herself. She knew she was being ridiculous. She knew she should focus on the fact that Angel was next to her and that she could reach out and touch him, that she could talk to him...and yet she felt hereof becoming more and more distant in order to protect her heart should he decide to leave again. He had given no indication that he would but the thought of him finding his own way again scared her.

She could sense him looking at her though anytime she would see what he was looking at he would look away just seconds before she turned her head to him. Oh good lord could they be any sadder? They were not teenagers! Angel had been an adult for longer than she cared to think about in that moment and she had lost her innocence and her chance at being a kid a long time ago! So what was wrong with them that they continued to skate around one another like they were?

She laughed as the blanket that Angel had tossed at her covered her entire body and pulled it off, pouting at his retreating back as it had messed up her hair. She quickly pulled the hair band off of her wrist and threw her hair up into a low pony tail. She tended to keep it down most of the time but since Angel had messed up her hair it was going to go back up. She knew he preferred it down so maybe that would teach him a lesson.

She was surprised but pleased when he brought his glass of blood upstairs. She knew in the past he had hated to drink it in front of her so she was glad that it had changed. She also knew that a large part of it had to do with the fact that they were alone at the house for once so he didn't have to worry about grossing anyone out. Hell if he would take it she would just offer hers but she knew him well enough to know that it wouldn't happen.

Flicking through the channels she settled upon what looked like the 1960s version of Romeo and Juliet. "I figure at least this way we both already know how it ends." She told him with a laugh, leaning across him so that she was literally laying on his lap. She quickly reached out a hand to grab the pillow that was on the side of him before moving back to her own spot and curling her body around the throw pillow.

At least they hadn't missed any of the move.

Word Count:: 500
Tag:: Liam 'Angelus' O'Connor
Outfit:: Click here for Buffy's outfit
Note:: He is gonna have to make the first move.

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[angel]

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Note: Aw damn! haha

Having positioned the glass well enough that it was out of sight, yet easily accessible, it felt like some.. small step in the right direction of complete comfort. It was still not something he was entirely sure off, he knew that many disliked the sight, disliked the smell and even further disliked his consumption of the substance, but Buffy and a few others had urged him that he was 'family' Although that very word felt.. warming, he felt nothing alike the others that occupied the house, he was essentially a loner, he preferred the silence, the darkness and even more so the complete solitude, naturally he enjoyed the company of Buffy when there was time, but even then it felt like they didn't have enough time. At any rate, as he sat down beside her once more he noticed that she had put her hair up. It was amusing really, for someone who claimed to not worry about their appearance too much, Buffy certainly had an odd way about it. Settling beside her his arm casually slipped around her shoulders as he gazed to her, this time if she looked to him he would not look away, idly his fingers trailed over her shoulder and neck, lightly pushing aside stray hair strands; as she flicked threw the channels.

When she spoke, he cast his gaze towards the TV, the amount of times he had both, read and seen such a play was countless, yet it was a fine piece of work, that would always captivate his interest. Yet when face with Buffy of the play, there was only one girl on his mind, and she sat beside him, her blonde hair hung elegantly down her back, in small waves that had since dried from their bath. Something.. troubled her perhaps? she wore that small frown the one that ever so lightly caused the smallest crease in her brow, he of course had felt that.. tension in a sense but it was since confirmed. As the rolling credits begun, signaling the start of the movie his eyes did not stray from Buffy, as his long fingers continued to trace small patterns upon her neck. "Somethings.. troubling you." He stated calmly his voice soft and low as he frowned a fraction, concern evident as he did so. With a shift in position he turned to face her. "Buffy.. what's going on, this.. is not us we are not usually like this." He questioned and thought out loud, was it him? had he done something? said something?

Doubt begun to cloud his mind, despite as he tried to push such thoughts back. He knew he would end up doing something wrong he seemed to have a habit of doing that. Angel knew happiness was often sometimes too good to be true..Still he pushed negative thoughts aside and swore to himself silently in that moment he'd try to make things better.. "Talk to me.. " He pleaded quietly, it seemed to him that despite how much time they spent with one another, they never truly talked, or when they did talk it was never really about them. Reaching for the remote he muted the TV in his attempts to secure Buffy's attention. As he gazed to her his brown eyes pleadingly searched for some answers.. perhaps it was something small perhaps not but the atmosphere between them was not something he could deal with, or pretend like it wasn't there.

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[NON-PLAYABLE CHARACTER ACCOUNT]

Stacy ran through the woods, looking over her shoulder to find two demons chasing after her. She didn't want to have to ask for help but unfortunately these demons were too strong for her. She was one of the newer girls and hadn't been trained as much as some others had been. Hell she wasn't even supposed to be patrolling by herself...and she technically hadn't been. She had been at the movies with her friends and they had been walking to their cars when she had heard screams. She had pretended to forget something and had run towards the sound after telling her friends to go without her.

Unfortunately that had been a mistake as the one demon had turned out to be a pair of demons and they had been strong and had long pokers sticking out our their arms. She had tried but with only a stake for a weapon it did little good hence her running through the woods trying to find someone to help. Luckily she hadn't been that far away from the boarding house so she kept running. The demons seemed to sense that she would be going for help as they stopped following her and turned around however she kept running, knowing that if she got to the boarding house she could get help and they could take care of the demons.

She burst in and winced when she saw Buffy and the vampire that seemed to never be seen other than in her presence. "Demons, woods. Help." She muttered through her heaving and noted that Buffy stood up immediately. She caught what she thought was "we will finish this conversation later ." Before she followed the blonde slayer outside...

Wishing she would have been able to right by herself.

[ADMIN BRITT]